Dealing with the loss of a Loved One – Emotion Control ? NANAK SATGUR BHEYTIA PURÉE HOVEY JUGT
Gurbani does not advocate the stifling of normal human emotions. It recognizes the need for human emotional expressions within socially accepted norms.
Guru Arjun ji has a salok on page 522 SGGS.
NANAK SATGUR BHEYTIA PURÉE HOVEY JUGT
Nanak, the Shabad has blessed me with the perfect way towards Godly realization.
HASENDIAN KHEYLENDIAN PENENDIYAAN KHAVENDIYSAN VICHEY HOVEY MUKAT.
I realize Him while living a full range of human emotions – (laughing HASENSDIYA , playing KHEYLENDIYAN , adorning PENENDIYAAN, eating KHAVENDIAAN are metaphors for a worldly life lived within normal situations.
Guru Nanak ji has a shabad on page 953 where every verse is about some segment of society crying and weeping. It ends with the verse NANAK DUKHIYA SAB SANSAAR
The message here is that weeping is an expression of human beings in pain of separation.
The excessive display of human emotions to express anger at the Creator or to expect specific outcomes is critiqued in Gurbani.
There is two verses within the same shabad on page 885 to this effect.
*ROVEN HAREY KEE KAVUN TEIK …,ROVEN HAAR BHEE UUTH SIDHAYEE. *
What TEIK (in terms of a changed outcome) can one expect from weeping… the weeping individual too will someday have to walk the same path that we r weeping over.
Looking at these verses holistically we get the message that expression of human emotions is considered normal and necessary. Gurbani does not want to deny us our human emotional expression.
But Gurbani tells us that humans need to understand the limitations of our emotions – they cannot bring about a change in the outcome. And should not be used in despair for the Creator.
The underlying message is to keep the Creator within our conscience at all times – joys and sorrows.
The verse is TERA KEEYA MEETHA LAGEY.
Meaning I desire the emotion of acceptance in all that You do.
Note pls that the word is KEEYA. It encompasses acceptance for an entirety of Gods WILL for us.